drown

I cannot bear with the emptiness in my heart.
I haven't experienced insomnia for the longest time, probably since I've settled down in HK.
The feeling of loneliness is dragging me down to nowhere.

Sometimes even I wonder whether I am actually sick, like mentally sick.
Except I am pretty sure most of the time, my mental health status is pretty stable.

At this very moment of my life, all I want to do is to sit there and let the tears drop.
I probably do not have a reason for crying, except I don't know how to bear with the sudden depression.



So far, everything in my life followed what I have planned before.
Then why am I lack of satisfaction?  Why am I still looking for a reason to cheer myself up?
What am I fighting for?  What am I aiming for?
What is the purpose of my life?

My heart is gently being tore apart.
There is always that one question, that one doubt in the deepest part of my heart.
And that is the last question I should be asking.

Probably deep inside my heart, I know the answer inside out.
Except I simply do not have the courage to face it.